Funk

I have always used this word to describe certain types of moods or feelings.

But today someone did not know what I meant, and this made me wonder if anyone else is sheltered in this way. And if so, then I would like to enlighten them.

To begin with, this word is actually in the dictionary, but I am not talking about the 'ghastly smell' part, or the 'cowering with fear'. The kind of funk I am referring to is 'a depressed state', though in my opinion it means more then being depressed.

Today I was in such a state, of being in a funk.

I felt.........strange. numb. easily irritated. apathetic.

Not mad.

Not sad.

Not happy.
Not anything.

This happens to me occasionally, but today I had absolutely no reason for it.

I could not think of one single thing to 'pin' the blame on.

Which only added to the frustration.

I finally 'decided' that joy is a choice.

Along with love, trust, faith, and pretty much everything else in life.

Choosing to do the right thing, or the wrong.

It is my choice.

What will I choose today? Or tomorrow? Or next week? Or in 5 years?

Of course all of my choices should be directed by God, for His glory and purpose.
Always remembering that my choices effect eternity, mine and other people's.

What an impossible responsibility.

I need you God.

~noel~