ready or not

So many thoughts are going through my mind, so many things I could write.

I guess I'll start with Christmas and say that this year's was the BEST ever. Of course I say that every year and it is true. Even though my little sister Trinity got RSV and could not go to any of the Christmas functions. Also, my parents got sick Christmas day and have been since then. Still, this was an amazing Christmas, and as always my favorite was giving presents to my family. I love the whole process; the shopping, thinking, wrapping, but most of all seeing their faces. My favorite present was probably a comforter set:

Isn't it cute? My mom has very good taste, and it is soooo soft, which is very important.

I am looking forward to the New Year and what it will bring. This year has gone by so fast, and at the same time seems like forever since it started. I feel like a totally different person than I was at the start of 2008. I think that I have grown in my faith, and have definitely had some character building. I do not feel old, yet neither do I feel young. I look at my younger siblings and remember being there, and wonder how I could have acted the way they do.
I feel content, which is a new thing for me. Ever since I graduated I have felt impatient and confused about what I was supposed to do next. Just within the last few days I have felt this sense of peace and joy. Nothing has changed in the physical sense and the fact that I still don't have any plans, but I have this feeling that it really does not matter. Like having a plan is not what is really important. What is important is trusting that God has a plan, and that I am right in the middle of His plan. Because He does not make any mistakes, and I am not here by accident.
Right now I feel free, like I could do anything. I know that doubts will come, but one of my New Year's resolutions is to not think about it. To just keep following God and not let the fear of man, or pride influence the decisions I make.

I do have some New Year's resolutions.....but I think I'll wait until it is actually 2009, seems more fitting lol. I hope that everyone has a wonder New Year's, and remembers that God is God, no matter what is going on in your life. Love ya!

be free
~noel~

I’m waking up
The world is turning
The sun is shining again
I’m holding on
To things I shouldn’t
It’s time to let them go
I’ve been on a losing streak
Hit so hard I couldn’t speak
But when I hear Your voice it fades away

And I can hear You say
It’s a brand new day
The pain goes away I’m headed for the door
And I’m going home I’m going home I’m going home I’m going home

Your love, it burns
Away my darkness
You guide me when I’m blind
You are the light
That shines inside me
Showing me I’m
So much more

When I’ve been on a losing streak
Hit so hard I couldn’t speak
But when I hear Your voice it fades away