Thursday, September 3, 2009

Africa - {Part 3}

Now for the fun part :) or fun-er......because the whole trip was amazing!

Tuesday morning (August 12) we went to a market and shopped, that was a lot of fun! The stuff was really cool, so different, and my favorite part was watching people try to barter. The people who owned the shops were hilarious. They acted like you were personally starving their children if you suggested a lower price.......and some were kind of creepy about it.

Tuesday afternoon we left for our safari (which actually means trip or journey), it was a 2 hour drive to the entrance of the park, and another 2 hours until we reached the lodge. It was fun though, we had all the young people in one van, there was much laughter :).

I'm having a hard time thinking of words to say, there is really no way to do it justice.....maybe pictures will be better than words;

Entrance of the Park....
(I found the skulls very reassuring)

Megan, John and Marcus, and our driver; Juumbo

Giraffe we saw on the way in
Voi Safari Lodge

View from lodge - Watering hole

Baboon (soooo ugly lol)

Elephants

Giraffes.....they were my favorite animal


Leopard (so awesome!)


Zebra

At some point I became bored with 'another zebra'.....so I took pics of the tourists :P

Marcus and David were bored too.....LOL
David, Marcus, Austin, John, Tate, Megan, and I
I had so much fun with these people, they are
awesome! The trip would not have been the same
without them :)
It was a looooong ride home......poor David :P
The Safari was amazing! I felt like I was in some reality video game of Animal Planet......to think that I was right there, watching all of those animals. Once in lifetime experience.
I really meant to finish talking about Africa in this post, but the photos took forever........and there is NOT enough time for me to talk about coming home (NIGHTMARE!) or the insane surprise ending to our trip.
(that called a teaser, ladies and gentlemen, tune in next time.....)
be free
~noel~

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

lost in the fake reality......

I meant to finish up about Africa before I posted again, but I've been going through some things, and it always makes me feel better to write it down.

These 'things' were brought on by the Truth Project, as has happened before, and have really just shaken my hold on what I thought was real, and what my life (I thought) was all about.

I find it ironic that I am going through this right as I get back from a life changing mission trip. That as I come off the spiritual 'high' that you get whenever you are totally immersed in something so focused on God, I start to lose my focus so quickly. I am really just digested with myself, that I am SO easily distracted by things that don't matter. And even more, the fact that even after I am AWARE of this issue, I continue to be distracted. Time and time again I have to pull my attention back from wherever it was........(who knows really).......and focus on Christ.

I think it all comes down to; Where am I Finding My Significance?
my family?
my friends?
my talents?
all the ministries I'm involved in?
being an example?
mission trips?
quiet time?
relationships?
sports?
stuff? (cell phone, comp, clothes, car, etc)
knowing that I'm right?
music?


Or am I truly looking to Christ Jesus for EVERYTHING?

Honestly? I would have to say no........and even more sad, is I don't know if I have ever truly found everything that I needed in God. I say that I am trusting Him, and that all I have is His. But I'm always working other angles, looking for ways to make myself look better or even having false humility, all for the praise of men. How stupid.

And how must God feel each and every time I do this? It actually physically hurts me to think about this, I get a sick feeling in my stomach. Because I know that I can never stop in my own power, that it is not possible for me to find all of my significance in Christ without a miracle. Is a miracle possible? Oh yes, I serve a God of miracles.

You want to know one of the coolest things that I have heard in a long time? (and I've heard this before, but didn't really get it)
God, The God of The Universe, (mountain maker, ocean tamer, star creator, wind breather, you know....GOD), well, He adopted me into His family.............He LIVES in me!!!
(now do I understand this? nope. Do I believe this? Yup. Do I believe that this is really real? I don't know if I can actually comprehend it)
God is 3 persons.....but one. Infinity divided by 3= infinity. Infinity divided by 36 = infinity. How is this possible? I have no idea. But I do understand that this is how God (all of Him) can live inside me, and live inside you, and live inside cousin Bob :) All at the same time. mind blowing.

Read a verse in Ephesians this morning that goes with this so well;
Eph. 1:13 - 14
In Him, you also, after listening to the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation--having also believed, you were sealed in Him with the Holy Spirit of promise,
14 who is given as a pledge of our inheritance, with a view to the redemption of God's own possession, to the praise of His glory.

I thought it was pretty cool, that after I listened to the message of truth, accepted Christ, than I was sealed in Him, adopted into His family, with the Holy Spirit, who is given as a pledge of my inheritance, that I am God's own possession..........wow.

Now if I can just keep these Truths in the forefront of my mind, for them to be the what I am thinking about and meditating on. I feel like I have just scratched the surface, and that there is SO MUCH MORE that God wants to show me.

lost in the fake reality...
consumed by the skin of this world....
knowing in my heart what is real, but being deceived is NOT an excuse.....
I know WHO is the way, the Truth, and the life.....

~noel~


numb

my heart is cold
I feel nothing
my mind is numb
there must be something
something more
than just getting through the day
doing what has to be done
struggling with words to say
where is the passion?
the fire?
the bravery and courage?
life seems like just a struggle to get higher
out of an endless nothingness
where is the light?
am I blind?
or will it just always be night?


broken

Lord I want to be broken
spilled out for You
oh God, I want to be broken
my plans and wishes torn in two
please use me now
in ways I can't imagine
and through that
give me a peace that man can't fathom
do anything you want with me
'cause all I want is to BE FREE
give me the strength to trust
when you close and open doors
my heart is broken
and my pride is on the floor

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Africa - {Part 2}

Lets see, I think I left off at the end of the Pastor's Conference, which was a Friday. The next day, Saturday, was the first day of Open Air Meetings. I was nervous, very nervous. Megan and I were volunteered (or as my dad says, voluntold), to do the singing for our team, and to run the children's program also. The children's program is very important, because if there is a lot of children at the front of the truck than none of the men will come, they will think it is for children.

This is what the meeting looks like




My team consisted of 12 American members, and about 50 of the Pastor's and their wives. I loved my team! All of them, I got to know each one of them and it was amazing how each of us had our own strengths and talents that God brought together for His purpose.



Back to the meeting; when we got the village we unloaded and started setting up. Now over the course of the past week I thought I had gotten used to the poverty and dirt, but this village was a whole new level. And I have to admit that I was shocked and a little put-off at first, I'm ashamed of it now, but my first thought was about myself and whether I was safe, from disease and such. God quickly rebuked my spirit and I was able to focus on what was really important. We were supposed to have the children's program during the big meeting, but we had sooooo many village kids as we were setting up that we went ahead and started. We had at least 120 kids, we sang some songs, taught them 'Jesus Loves Me', and gave the salvation message. Most of the kids raised their hands and prayed the Sinners Prayer. It was amazing.







After Brent, our team leader, started calling people to come listen, Megan and I climbed up on the back of the pickup and sang. I have to tell you, I was really nervous......I had never sang in front of people like that before, complete strangers in a different country at that. But the Lord was gracious and we did a pretty good job, I think. We sang 3 songs; This is the Day, All in All, and the Zeal of God (in English and Swahili). The rest of the meeting went well, I don't remember exactly how many salvation's we had, but there were many.

The second day of open air meetings I will remember forever........It was the day that I was stretched, pulled, and pretty much thrown of my box by God. At the morning meeting I was not feeling well, but sang and helped Megan anyway.

That afternoon we set up for our second meeting at a public beach. When we pulled up I was like, 'Are you serious???? God, you don't really expect me to do this, do You???'

The beach

There were at least 3,000 people there, all different nationalities and religions. There were white people, Muslims, and so many black faces. The whole time we were setting up I was trying to think of reasons not to go up there and sing. Two of the African pastor's sang this amazing song, with harmonies, clapping, and dancing.......then, Brent says, "Now please welcome two ladies who have come all the way from America to sing for you."

That did it......if I was not completely terrified before, I certainly was then. I don't really remember climbing up the steps to the back of the truck, but suddenly was up there. I felt like was by my-self, completely vulnerable, with thousands of people staring at me.....waiting. Megan started singing, and I followed, my knees shaking and my voice breaking more than once. Than it was over, done, and Tate was up there giving his testimony like nothing happened. I was completely drained, but at the same time felt like I could do anything. I mean, what could be worse than what I just did?
We were able to get back to the resort earlier that day, and I remember just being on this high, like I could conquer the world, it was pretty awesome.
The third, and last day of open air meetings, was pretty relaxed. The Pastor's got to do everything, so we just watched :). That was so much fun! They did all the preaching, teaching, singing, and giving testimonies. And they did it just as good, or even better than we did. They have so much passion and enthusiasm......it really inspired me.
Monday night we all went back to the high school, where the conference was held, and gave all of the Pastor's and their wives a certificate saying they completed the conference, a RSI pin, and a set of tapes with the teachings from the conference, (the infamous tapes :P).
Than we had a worship/celebration service, it was amazing, incredible, awesome, inspiring, emotional....I'm running out of words, but you get the idea. If I could go back and relive just one experience from the trip it would probably be that night, probably.
Thats about it for now, more to come :).
be free
~noel~

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Africa {part 1}

Where do I start?
It is not that I have forgotten anything, on the contrary, I have so many memories that I do not know where to begin.

I left on Thursday, July 30th, and met up with my other 35 team members. Some at the OKC airport, and others at Dulles, Washington DC. We traveled for two days, and it felt like it. Time did NOT fly, I got so bored on those planes. I did enjoy the actual traveling part; getting stamps in my passport, walking through the airports with purpose, and of course taking off :). We were delayed some along the way, so we did not arrive in Mombasa, Kenya until 2 a.m. local time, Saturday August 1st. At that point I was so exhausted that I didn't even really 'see' where I was, or notice my surroundings at all. Megan and I just got our room key and fell into bed. Were we in for a surprise the next morning........


I woke up to the sound of the waves breaking on the shore, and thought for sure that I was dreaming, and when I opened my curtains....I KNEW that I was dreaming. The ocean was right outside our door!!! And it was a beautiful ocean, different shades of gorgeous blue, white sands, puffy white clouds in the sky. It was perfect, I asked Megan if we were in the right place, if this was a mission trip?!?!?


My view :)






The next two days the team had meetings and organized things for the Pastor's conference, of course it wasn't all work :). Took some walks on the beach, swam in the AMAZING pool, and played some basketball. But before you all sign up for next year let me tell you that it was about to get REALLY intense........




Monday we started registering 250 pastors plus their wives. That was fun, I helped write out name tags, and really enjoyed meeting these men and women. They were so friendly, and just happy to be there. After they were registered we all gathered in the auditorium and had a worship service. And I mean WORSHIP!!! It was mind blowing, their singing, their faces, their joy, their prayers, everything......I could barely take it all in, well I couldn't take it all in. I remember sitting in the back of the bus on the way back, completely overwhelmed by all that I had just experienced. What I didn't know, was that it was just beginning.



That night Megan, Sarah and I stayed up pretty late writing out our testimonies for the next day. Three days of the conference the young people went to a different school and talked to the kids. Tuesday was the first day, which just happened to be my birthday, and I was sooooo nervous. I had a relatively easy thing to talk about, forgiveness, but I was scared. I think it was just fear of the unknown, here I was in a different country, on my bday, away from my family, with strangers, about to get up in front of 80 kids, having to talk through an interpreter, not knowing if they would 'get' what I was saying or not. God is good, and I survived. And I learned a lesson, its not all about me. It wasn't about me saying some profound, life-changing words. It is about those kids knowing the love of Jesus, and experiencing it in their lives.



On Thursday I didn't go out with everyone else, I stayed at the conference to help tape the teaching sessions, (and the whole taping/duplicating process is a WHOLE other story, ask me about it sometime....it got pretty crazy lol). Anyway, I stayed, and had a blast playing with some of the Pastor's kids. They were SO much fun, and I was just struck by how kids from Africa are no different than kids from America.


This is Joseph, Mary, and Shalom






Friday was the last day of the conference, I really enjoyed seeing those Pastor's everyday, and don't tell them, but I had a few favorites :)

I'm going to save the rest for another post, so check back. I'll try to post at least every week until the whole 'story' is told.

be free
~noel~

Saturday, July 25, 2009

soooooo.....Africa

I leave to go to Africa in four days....that is really fast!! I'm getting a little nervous, which is weird, because I was not nervous last year. Maybe that is because I never let myself actually think about it very much, you know the whole 'no passport' thing. Anyways, I'm nervous about; being on a plane for 34 hours, about going to another country, about getting malaria, about some things going on at home, about giving a testimony on purity, about spending my birthday with total strangers, and about coming home, I know that sounds weird. On the other hand I am VERY VERY VERY VERY excited about going!!! I have dreamed about going to Africa for as long as I have been going to Western Hills. I am looking forward to; traveling to another country, meeting new people, seeing how mature I really am and how I handle being gone from home for 2 1/2 weeks, spending time with Megan, building my relationship with Jesus, the beach, and so much more.

Just some of my thoughts, and yes, there have been more......trust me. (I'm a girl, thinking about stuff is what I do, ALL the time lol)

For anyone who is interested here is a timeline for my trip;

July 30- Leave OKC (I'll be at the airport at 9 am, my flight leaves at noon)

July 31- Arrive Mombasa Kenya 10 pm

August 1_2- setup for conference

August 3_7- Pastor's conference (everyday the youth will go out to different church's and give testimony's)

August 8_10- Crusades with local pastor's

August 11- clean up & shop

August 12_13- Safari

August 14- Start flying back

August 15- Arrive home around 8 pm (I'll get back with you on the exact time)


Thats about it.....I should prolly start doing some packing now, and I still have a little bit of shopping to do.
I'm going to miss everyone SOOOO much, but I know that time will fly (it always does) and I'll be back too soon.

be free
~noel~

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Do you ever feel like life is going by so fast, and things are happening all around you, and your mind is so full of things that you never stop thinking about, and you can hardly take a breath and try to figure out what to do next?????
That is the way I have felt for the last few months, I've been rushing around just doing the next things and not taking a moment just to sit back and think. Last night I went to a leadership meeting, and while I was there we started talking about some stuff and everything just kind of came into focus for a minute. Of course now my thoughts are all jumbled up again, but I think I'm on the right path. When I write things out they usually make more sense, so here are some of my thoughts;

  • First we talked about Truth, as in The Truth, which is God.
  • There are two sides; Truth, which is reality. And Lies, which is an illusion
  • The Truth is not relative, negotiable, changeable, or debatable - Truth is Reality
  • I either believe The Truth or I believe a lie, there is no middle ground
  • The Spirit of Truth (Holy Spirit) guides me in Truth, that is the only way I can walk in Truth
  • If I cannot 'hear', than I do not belong to God

Then we talked about some lies that we believed, because if it is not Truth than it is a lie. That was really mind blowing and I am still trying to wrap my mind around it........

But I also do not ever want to stop searching for Truth, to come to a place where I think I'm good enough I can stop trying now. I want to always keep striving to know more and dig deeper into God's Truth. Because God is Truth and Truth is God.

One of the lies that I believe is that I can do good by myself, I let my pride take over and I really believe that I am better than other people. When The Truth is that I am no different, that I am the lowest of the low, that if not for the grace of God I would be like him or like her. And that anything good that comes out of what I do is ALL God, period.

I read this verse a few weeks ago and really liked it, but I remembered it last night it just calmed my spirit and gave me peace;

Acts 17:26-28

"That they would seek the Lord, in the hope that they might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us; for in Him we live, and move, and have our being."

I'm not sure I feel any less jumbled, but now I'm not jumbled alone :P I hope that you are still searching for Truth and are not satisfied with what you already know. If you are, come to You Grow this August with an open heart and you won't be satisfied for very long.

be free

~noel~

Monday, June 15, 2009

Character Week :)

Character Week was amazing, I had so much fun.....even though I was sooooo tired and it was hard to keep my energy up. We had 98 kids, more then we've had for a few years. And about half of those kids were from the community.

At some point during the week while I was walking around making sure everyone was doing what they we're supposed to do; it hit me how old I am. And not really in years, but just how much older I was than a lot of the other volunteers. I also remembered that I was the same age or older than the people that 'ran' Character Week when I was younger, and how old I thought they were.

I was going to write this really long post and catch up, but its late and I'm tired, so goodnight :)

be free
~noel~